1 thing to try right now to have a better relationship with everyone you know -Compliment Generously
Nobody likes being complained about. But that was my norm growing up.
My dad was in the Indian Air Force, and everyone admired him for his perfectionism. Naturally, I was super proud and wanted to be just like him (still do!). But striving for perfection has its downsides and boy, am I living proof of that! I got so used to criticism that anything less than perfect just felt… wrong.
Fast forward to my college days — I was studying Mechanical Engineering, but secretly moonlighting in visual design. There weren’t any mentors to guide me in design, just friends and professors who were mostly all praises. It was only when I stepped into the professional world that I started getting the real deal — unfiltered, professional feedback. But I loved it. I was all about soaking up that feedback and improving.
Then came the Elon Musk phase (ah, those fanboy days!). His philosophy — assume you’re wrong to be less wrong — just clicked with me.
I got really good at taking feedback. I didn’t make them personal. Whether it was from a seasoned pro giving me precise critiques or someone less experienced with vague comments, I learned to dig deeper and understand their perspective.
I was on a mission to be less wrong, both in my professional and personal life. Good strategy… right?
Unfortunately, not everyone thinks so. I learned it the hard way after upsetting some very close people to me without having a clue of what I was doing wrong.
We all have different ways of dealing with feedback, influenced by our experiences and personal beliefs. Some folks see it as a stepping stone to improvement, while others find certain feedback undermines their expertise. It can be a big blow to their self-confidence.
And how many people can really claim they are perfect at articulating their thoughts into words? I’m definitely guilty of miscommunicating to my spouse, my friends, and my parents repeatedly, and also misunderstanding the received critique.
It is easy it is to call someone clumsy for spilling water, or lazy for forgetting something. But, one should remember —
We’re all swimming in a sea of negativity already.
People are constantly facing online criticism, dealing with their own self-doubts, and let’s not even get started on the state of the world. Do you sincerely wish to contribute to that pile of negativity? Not cool, especially when it’s people we care about — our family, friends, partners, even coworkers.
So here’s a thought: Let’s be the ones who spread positivity. Think about it. When someone makes a mistake, they’re probably already beating themselves up inside. Do we need to pile on? Or can we be the ones who help them smile, and feel a bit better about themselves?
I say, let’s turn up the compliment game.
Your friend lends you their car? Shower them with heartfelt thanks.
Mom brews a killer cup of coffee? Make her day with some genuine praise.
Partner whips up a semi-burnt but tasty cake? Tell them it’s the best thing ever and how lucky you are to have them.
But be sincere — it’s crucial.
Over-complimenting isn’t about laying it on thick; it’s about finding more of those moments to genuinely make someone feel great.
And when it comes to critiquing, keep it specific and never personal. Try to see the intention behind the action. It helps in giving constructive feedback without denting the person’s spirit.
Critique the deed, not the doer.
It’s all about helping them grow without feeling attacked.
Remember, a genuine compliment can turn someone’s day around. And hey, it feels pretty good to be the reason someone smiles, right? Let’s make that our mission. Let’s be the light in someone’s day, not the cloud.
